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Showing posts from August, 2025

Between Judgment and Compassion: The Faces of Grief

 Just the other day I saw a Facebook post from someone celebrating their deceased loved one’s birthday. One statement that stood out to me was that they said they have not grieved or mourned their loved one’s death. The judgmental person in me said in my head, uhm yes you have. This person I know personally has been in multiple drunk stupors, drug binges, and Facebook crash outs over the years since the time of the death. Although my first thoughts were based on pure judgment, I quickly started to feel bad. Everyone’s grieving and mourning is different. It does not look the same on everyone. I am quite sure they were probably taught to believe that grief looks like sadness, isolation, and dark clouds. From my experience, it is a dark cloud, but the person under that cloud may be expressing it a different way. When I lost my brother at 13, I acted out in many different ways, not realizing I was grieving and mourning. Now my grieving and mourning look different. I don’t have the sp...

The Caregiver Never Cared For

 "All my life I had to fight" lol. But honestly, those words resonate with me so much these days. All my life I have been a caregiver. I cared for my parents, cousin, and grandmother. I never really sat back to realize how much these experiences have shaped me to become the person I am, was, and am evolving to. I don’t know where I am in this life journey. But what I do know is that the journey has not been easy, and it has forced me to unlearn and reevaluate my life choices and the things I can and cannot tolerate. From a little girl, my parents have always been sickly. They had me going into their 40s after living a very rough and wild life. My parents were in the streets, for lack of better words, and they did not take care of their health. My father had a kidney removed and was on dialysis from around the time I was 9-ish, I believe, until his death when I was 22. That is an extremely long time to be on dialysis, and it created so many other health problems. So through a...